Things I Can't Do

Just so everyone doesn't think I'm this holier-than-thou bitch who hates everything, here's a list of things I can't do:

• Make rice.
• Make omelettes.
• Make caramel.
• Not listen to Eklektikos every single day, despite my intense irritation with John Aielli's inane rambling.
  
• Read most culinary theory.

I messed up there, at the end.